Braves Report: Unsavory playoff odds

Anyone else feel like they’re missing out on the party?

Like every other fan base is enjoying this beautiful, baseball-filled time of year — and we’re just … not?

Bad hitting. Injuries. A suspension. Untimely bullpen implosions.

We’ve been robbed of our springtime joy, y’all.

Quick links: Ohtani’s walk-off extends the misery | Good players, bad performances

WHAT LIES AHEAD

Credit: Natrice Miller/AJC

Credit: Natrice Miller/AJC

The Braves are (mercifully!) off today. The Marlins make their way to Truist Park for Friday’s home opener.

What do you say we take a look ahead before we ruminate on last night’s disaster?

🗓️ The schedule: 7:15 p.m. Friday on both FanDuel channels and Peachtree TV; 7:15 p.m. Saturday on FanDuel; 1:35 p.m. Sunday on FanDuel.

⚾ The starters: Spencer Schwellenbach, AJ Smith-Shawver, Grant Holmes, in that order, are the Braves’ probables.

🎣 Scouting report: The Marlins are somehow 4-3 with a roster that basically consists of Sandy Alcantara and a couple dozen children. They won three of four against the Pirates then lost a series to the Mets.

☀️ The weather: Pack that sunscreen if you’re headed to a game. We’re looking at high temperatures near 90 degrees on Friday and Saturday.

ABOUT LAST NIGHT

Credit: Kevork Djansezian/AP

Credit: Kevork Djansezian/AP

As faithful reader Rick points out via email, no Major League Baseball team has ever finished 0-162.

But a week in, the Braves sure are doing their best. What do you say we take a quick look at their latest heartbreaker?

😄 The good: Atlanta trotted out a lineup that included Bryan De La Cruz, Nick Allen, Stuart Fairchild, Chadwick Tromp and Eli White — and put together five runs in the first two innings against Dodgers ace Blake Snell.

Walks and errors helped plenty, but Matt Olson’s two-run double felt pretty good.

😬 The bad: That was all the offense. Third baseman Austin Riley (just 3-for-27 on the season) came up with the bases loaded in the sixth and struck out looking.

“From a personal standpoint, it’s embarrassing what I’ve displayed offensively, and I’ve got a lot of work to do,” Riley said.

🥴 The ugly: Closer Raisel Iglesias, one of very few reliable arms in the Braves bullpen these days, gave up the game-tying double in the eighth — and Shohei Ohtani’s walk-off shot in the ninth.

“I don’t wish this on anybody honestly,” manager Brian Snitker said.

THEN THERE’S THIS

Credit: Kevork Djansezian/AP

Credit: Kevork Djansezian/AP

Columnist extraordinaire Michael Cunningham crunched the numbers on 0-7 starts and … they’re not great.

📈 From his piece: “Three of 23 teams to start 1-6 before this year made the playoffs, according to Baseball Reference. But none of the 27 teams to start 0-7 have pulled it off in the World Series era (since 1903).”

Yikes. And yes, that includes plenty of teams in the age of expanded playoffs.

📈 More from Michael: “The Braves said all the things you’ve heard before. They’ve got too many good hitters to be this bad for long. They’ll get it going eventually. Those words might be more persuasive if the offensive struggles were just about these seven games. The reality is that the sample size also includes last season.”

Which, you’ll recall, was a bit of a slog, even when guys were healthy.

📈 For the record, I think they ultimately limp in one way or another. But my how quickly the Braves have gone from title contenders to “can they make the playoffs?”

RIVAL WATCH

🔔 The Phillies are 4-1 and leading the division. Off the field, they’re in court trying to stop an analytics company they’ve worked with from also selling parts of its platform to other teams — including one mystery squad from the NL East.

🎣 The Marlins are described above.

🚽 The Mets beat the Marlins in extras Wednesday and sit at 3-3. They get Toronto next.

🪰 The Nationals have one more win than the Braves. Lucky.

GET OVER TO GWINNETT

Rehabbing Braves ace Spencer Strider is slated for his second start with the Triple-A Gwinnett Stripers on Friday.

First pitch: 7:05 p.m. Looks like there’s a decent number of tickets still available. Postgame fireworks, too!

👀 Strider allowed one run in three innings during his first rehab start with Gwinnett.

Thanks for reading Braves Report. Tell a friend — and maybe give the AJC’s Sports Daily newsletter a shot, too.

Until next time.